Wedding Pro Tip: A Guide on Writing Heartfelt Vows

Express how much your partner really means through vows.

Getting married is no small matter. It’s a big step in life.  Perhaps the biggest so far.  Everything that leads to your wedding day can be daunting and overwhelming. Traditionally, no one wrote their own vow.  The officiant asks the big question to which the right answer is “I do.” But, times change, and more and more couples decide to write and read their own. IF you’re going to write your wedding vows, it’s one of the most daunting tasks you’ll have to go through.

It’s something you shouldn’t take lightly. Vows are the symbol of love and commitment. It’s your promise to each other, showing how you intend to navigate your way in the next leg of your life’s journey.

In other words, it’s a biggie. Your vows are considered sacred and should be filled with heart and sincerity. That’s easier said than done; most of the time, the words seem to evade us whenever we want to tell how much our partner means to us.

So, how exactly do you write your vows? Let’s check what the professionals have to say and learn their helpful tips on writing your perfect, heartfelt wedding vow.

Get Some Reference

Knowledge is power, and research is the key to that power. If you need help figuring out where or how to start writing your vows, get some reference. The internet is full of knowledge and information; you’ll get some examples from it.

However, don’t just copy other people’s vows. Copying them and replacing some parts with your own situation is also a big no-no. Instead, read their vows and learn from them. Learning what others wrote will give a general direction on where your own vows are heading.

Will your vows be on the serious side? Will they be on the funny side? Or maybe you’ll be writing them in a more emotional or moving style? You also don’t have to stick to one style. You can mix and match and see what works best for you.

Find Inspiration

Even writers have to get inspiration to get their brain juices going when writing. And writing a three-minute vow may feel the same as writing a 300-page book. Both writers should think about what to write and pour their heart and soul into writing the words that match their feelings. And it can be draining.

Avoid burning out and refresh your mind by finding inspiration. Go read your favorite book. Watch your favorite movie while eating your favorite food. Take a stroll through the park with your partner or go out to walk by the beach. Who knows, inspiration might hit you right then, and you’ll be able to put those feelings into words.

Moreover, your vows don’t have to be 100% original. Feel free to quote or make a reference from a movie or book that you and your partner find deep meaning in. It can be a line from a movie or book or a lyric from a song. However, this also means it shouldn’t be 100% copied from said reference. All in all, anything works as long as it’s meaningful and relevant to both of you.

Brain Dump and Take Your Pick

There will be people whose brains shut down while they’re trying to write their vows. And some people’s brains start to run a mile a minute with how much they want to express themselves. The former is problematic, but the same can also be said for the latter.

If you’re someone like the latter, take advantage of it! Don’t be overwhelmed by the thoughts zooming in your head. Instead, write them all down. Don’t worry about the grammar or spelling for now since the thought and essence matter the most. Don’t mind the order of what you’re writing as well.

After writing all your thoughts down, stop and reread what you wrote. Pick the best ones from your brain dump list and edit them. Correct the grammar, arrange them in order, and connect them to form a rough draft of your vows. You now have a base for your vows, and you can refine them and make necessary changes until you’re satisfied.

It’s Okay to Be Silly

Everything doesn’t have to be super serious on your wedding day. Don’t be afraid to be a little silly and inject some humor into your vows. Eliciting a smile or a laugh from your partner or guests can significantly lift the atmosphere and lighten everyone’s mood.

However, limit inside jokes because it might be difficult for the rest of the guests to relate. You don’t want to laugh alone with just you and your partner while leaving the others in the dark. If you are going to add an inside joke or two, provide enough context clues or a short explanation to let the others in on the fun.

Note the Specific Little Things

A vow is something sacred and memorable. It is a symbol and can act like a diary as you and your partner reflect on your time together. Therefore, your vow shouldn’t sound like a template because everything sounds generic. Make it more unforgettable and personal by being specific.

Write down the little things that strongly describe the moments you and your partner share. For example, instead of saying, “I love you because of your humor,” go for, “Olive, whenever you tell me a bad pun, ‘olive’ you even more.” In some cases, change “You’re so thoughtful” to “You always know when to get me some chocolate ice cream sandwich to make me feel better.”

There is no one-size-fits-all when it comes to writing vows. There is also no such thing as the one and only perfect vow. The perfect vow varies from couple to couple, person to person. It can be a short but meaningful vow or a long five-minute vow. It can be a serious vow, or a funny one, and so on.

As long as you wrote it from the heart and are sincere with every word. A vow that touches the heart of not only the crowd but also your partner, then that’s perfect enough.

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